The 12 Days of Christmas:
My true love gave to me:
12 drummers drumming (total: 12. cost: $2551.92)
11 pipers piping (total: 22. cost: $4,712.40)
10 lords a-leaping (total: 30. cost: $14,300.10)
9 ladies dancing (total: 36. cost: $25,175.88)
8 maids a-milking (total: 40. cost: $2,320.00)
7 swans a-swimming (total: 42. cost: $39,186.27)
6 geese a-laying (total: 42. cost: $1,050.00)
5 golden rings (total: 40. cost: $5,199.60)
4 calling birds (total: 36. cost: $5,399.64)
3 French hens (total: 30. cost: $1,500.00)
2 turtle doves (total: 22. cost: $1,100.00)
And a partridge in a pear tree (total: 12. cost: $1,943.88)
Add all that up and you get a whopping 364 items that total out to cost you $104,439.69!!!
The total cost of the 12 Days of Christmas is 2.8 times the average yearly income for American families. Oh, and did I mention that your 12 drummers, 22 pipers, 30 leapers, 36 dancers, and 40 milkers will only work or perform for you for an hour each? You want them longer, time to shovel out more cash. Also, this would be purchasing all these items over the counter. Order them off the Internet and your total will rise dramatically, mostly due to the cost of shipping live animals.
My suggestion to you would be to hug the ones you love this holiday season. When they ask where their gift is, smile and say "My love don't cost a thing." And when your children ask if true love costs anything, you can proudly and accurately tell them to start saving now!
Oh, and your Great Aunt Marge who always demands a Christmas gift has probably made you file bankruptcy. So... make sure you're in the will.
Scooter Out.
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