Lottery Madness

Yesterday, America went nuts with lottery madness.  With a jackpot of $640 million dollars, why not??  You miss 100% of the shots you don't take.

The jackpot sum was the largest in world history, and you have a 1 in 176 million chance of winning.  Basically, I have a better shot at being struck by lighting than winning the lottery.  But that didn't stop me from spending my $25 on lottery tickets!  :P

Well, somebody that God smiled on won.  If this person is the only jackpot winner, and they take the lump sum of cash, they will receive $462 million.  Uncle Sam has to take his share, you know.   I really hope this person does NOT fall into the category of 85% of lottery winners who are bankrupt within 3 - 5 years....  That would be really freaking sad.  In all honesty, I don't get how on earth you blow that much money that fast. 

Me.... If I won... I'd give some to my mom, some to my dad, donate to a few charities, and then disappear.  Lol.  Nobody would ever find me.  I'd travel the world and keep my winnings a complete secret from everyone.  Once I saw the world (or the parts of it I wanna see) I'd settle in a small town somewhere and live out the rest of my life (hopefully with a spouse and children) in tranquility.  :) 

On the up side of things, my mom just text me.  Out of the $640 million we COULD have won, we won $7.  :P  I think that means we got 2 or 3 numbers right.  Lol!!  I can buy 28 gum balls!!!!  Life is GOOD!

So my question to all my rabid readers is this:
If you won the lottery, what would you do?  I can't wait to read the answers!

Scooter Out.

I Feel Like I'm Having To Come Out Of The Closet All Over Again!!!

I met someone.  :)  Someone sweet and kind.  Loving, gentle, and respectful.  I get butterflies in my stomach and I feel like I'm walking on air.  There's only one thing that makes this totally different that the relationships I've been in for the last 10 years is....  The person I'm with is a man.

That's right!  Ladies and gentlemen, Ella has a boyfriend.  :P 

This is something that's very new and very foreign to me.  I don't really know how to be in a relationship with a man.  The last man I was in a relationship with beat the snot out of me.  So my experience with men is predominantly negative and quite fleeting.

So this guy.... He's pretty awesome.  Just saying.  :)  I have some major butterflies going on.  Lol.

I'll update a bit more later.  I'm currently at work and trying to bust my bum so  I don't get fired. 

Scooter Out.

Eek!!

I'm thrilled to say that for the next few days, I won't be back at work!  I have this magical thing called vacation time.  Basically, I get paid to sleep till noon, sit on my ass all day, drink the GOOD tequila with my dad, and play with my little nephew.  I love vacation.  :)

An update on daddy...  Today is (hopefully) his last chemotherapy treatment!  Woot!  After today, he gets re-evaluated to see if we can stop treatment or if he needs a few more.  I'm hoping it's over, but if a few more is what it takes to ensure that his Lymphoma is gone for good, then I'll take it.

I used to have a lot of guilt surrounding daddy's condition.  I blamed myself.  I know that sounds crazy, but it's true.  Now, I won't lie, I'd rather it have been me instead of him, but maybe the outcome of this is going to be worth the trial.  I think daddy may have made his peace with God.  He hasn't said so, but I think he may have.  To me, that is the sweetest blessing that could have come out of any curse.

My life has changed quite dramatically since the beginning of this blog.  I know that I'm a bit snark and sarcastic on here, but in all actuality, these past few months have documented a vast amount of personal growth.  I'm predominantly happy with my life as it stands.  The few things I'm not thrilled about... Well... God's timing is perfect and they'll change when He sets His plans for change in motion.  For now, I'm just waiting and praying.  :)

Well, I'm getting paged that breakfast is served.  :)  Gotta love grandpas!  I'll post pictures and other silly and fun things from my week of vacation!

Scooter Out.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!!

Well.... For those of you who don't know... Today is St. Patrick's Day.  :)  The one day a year where anyone can claim to be Irish, most people are trashed, and perfect strangers are allowed to pinch you for not wearing green. 



I've been told that somewhere in my blood I have a bit of Irish in me.  I don't know for sure if I do or not.  My family also tell me we're very distantly related to Hugh Hefner, but I haven't seen a penny of his Playboy money to support that, so.... Yea.

My mother tends to get a little overly-exuberant on most holidays.  Today is no exception.  She made green eggs and ham for breakfast.

She also made some green pancakes.



At some point this evening, she'll put her little weenie dog in it's green sweater.  As much as I purely hate and despise that dog, I must say.... She looks so cute in her little green sweater!!  :D

Americans believe that EVERYONE is Irish on St. Patrick's day.  At least most of us do...  I seem to forget that I'm American at times.  >_>;

Predominantly today is a day for fun I suppose.  People drink beer that looks like this:



And they have parades and parties and have an obscene amount of fun trying to figure out what foods and drinks can be turned green.  I'm pretty sure people have green shit for at least a week after. 

Obviously, I'm greening things up for a day myself.  But not to the extent of some.  In Chicago, they dye the river green.

This tradition has always fascinated me.  Not sure why.  I guess it's because....Well....They're dying a freaking RIVER green.

The tradition of dyeing the river green arose by accident when some plumbers used fluorescein dye to trace sources of illegal pollution discharges.  The dyeing of the river is still sponsored by the local plumbers union.

The United States Environmental Protection Agency outlawed the use of fluorescein for this purpose, since it was shown to be harmful to the river.  The present ingredients used to dye the river green today are safe for people and wildlife.  Forty pounds of powdered vegetable dye are used to color the river for the celebration.

In my house, we only dye food green.  St. Patrick's day is the one day per year my mother bakes home-made bread.  Why?  So she can dye it green...

Yup.  I'm dead freaking serious.  Green bread.  It kinda looks like Sponge Bob laid in green food coloring...  Just saying.  It's pretty tasty though, if you get past the color.

I'm not sure how I feel about some of the more silly traditions of St. Patrick's day.  Like the pinching.  I hate the pinching.  I'm not really sure why people do it.  Other than to be mean.  I hit people that pinch me.  Besides... I have green eyes.  Which means I am eternally safe from being pinched.  Woot!

Scooter Out.

And The Diagnosis Is....

I broke my foot.  :P  But not in a bad way.  I have what is called a "Proximal avulsion fracture of the 5th metatarsal".  Look that one up!  Lol!!

Basically, when I tripped and fell, I twisted my ankle REALLY bad.  When I did that, one of the tendons that attaches to the tiny bone in the top of my foot (the one that goes on to become my pinkie toe) ripped a piece of bone about the size of a pin head off the bone itself.  No big deal.  I don't need a cast and I can walk on it.  I have an epic bruise (it's PURPLE!!) and I have to ice it and elevate it but other than that I'm fine.

Here's an x-ray!!

Being off my feet last night gave me an excuse to be really productive on that owl.  It's done!  :D  And I think it's totally adorable with loads of personality.  I think I may start making and selling them.  I've already got an idea for a zombie owl.....  Just saying.  :P

Here's the finished product:

Excuse the foot in the picture.  I was elevating.  And the part of the blanket that you see on the left is a small portion of an absolutely GORGEOUS afghan my mom made. :)  We're all crafty.  Lol.

I also got flowers.  :P  I love lilies.  They're my favorite flower.  And when I got home from getting poked, prodded, and x-rayed, I found these on the table:

I should break my foot more often.  :P  Flowers, uninterrupted craft time, and a cuddly blanket.  Love it!  Lol. 

So, anyways, all is well and I get to keep my foot.  No amputation required.  :) 

Have a happy Friday, lovelies!!!

Scooter Out.

I Love E-Cards.

Hallmark can only get you so far in today's society.  I know they have some rockin' cards, but not the snarky, sarcastic, and slightly zombie themed cards I'd like to send people.  So I've switched to e-cards.  Here's some of my favorites so far:

  I feel this way about specific people all the time....

Enough said....

For you, my darling Ruby. :)

That's how I feel most days...

Just saying.

Especially these retards... 

Now, there are rare occasions when I find a totally awesome and epic card that is actually a card that can be physically given to someone or snail mailed to them.  Like this one I just sent to my baby-making brother and lovely sister-in-law:



I found this amazing card on Esty.com in one of my favorite stores.  I LOVE it!!!  And the lady who makes has an amazing sense of humor that goes perfectly with my family's.  :P 

I tend to find cool and funny things all over.  Like this wonderfully mis-labeled thing in Target the other day that made me think of a certain special computer friend of mine:

I love when I notice things like that.  :P  It's great.  And I can post it on my lovely blog so it brings joy to others!  Yay! 

OH!!  I've had a request from a reader and fellow blogger to post a picture of the prize owl I'm giving as a gift to the individual who guessed my name.  It's had  lot more work done on it since I took this (it's almost done now) but I thought I'd post it anyways.  :)

If you don't like it, Stephen, let me know and I'll do it a different way.  :)

Scooter Out.

From The Mind Of Baby Jaxon



Good morrow, ladies and gents!  I must say, this is quite the development!  Or shall I say that I am quite the development?  Not even nine months ago I didn't exist.  Now just look at my wondrous achievements!  I'm yet 3 days old and blogging!  By, George, I do believe that may be a new global record!

I must say, life outside the placenta is quite different than in the belly of my mother.  For one, there is much more room out here and it's not quite so dark.  But I daresay, these poking apparatuses they call "needles" leave something to be desired.  I do believe they've been the most unpleasant things I've experienced thus far.

I must comment about these odd creatures I have begun to know as "adults".  Namely, "mommy" and "daddy".  They speak some obscure language I do not understand, and when I try to communicate using my native tongue, they refer to it as "crying" or "babble".  I really do hope they learn my language soon.  This lack of communication is getting tiresome.

I do believe this life outside the womb is going to be if nothing else interesting.  I shall continue to give reports regarding my further discoveries.

Sincerely,

Sir Jaxon Scott

I HAVE A NEW BABY NEPHEW!!!!!

SAY HELLO TO BABY JAXON!!!!

2-29-2011

♥  My beautiful new nephew  ♥

Jaxon, love, your perfection is blinding.  ♥

Scooter Out.